Total Siyapaa

wogma rating: Watch if you have nothing better to do (?)

quick review:

Almost all attempts at humor seem forced.

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Director: E Niwas
Running time: 110 minutes
Genres: Comedy, Romance
More Movie Info

Total Siyapaa - Preview

A Punjabi girl brings a Pakistani guy home as the one she wants to marry. Siyapaa indeed - that, I am told, means trouble, lots of it. There's lots of potential for serious melodrama or rib-tickling gags or nasty India-Pakistan one-liners. Total Siyapaa seems to aim for some regular rom-com stuff. Which brings up the question - why have the India-Pakistan angle at all then?

Now, here lies my hope once again, that I am pre-judging wrong. I hope there is something more to Total Siyapaa than just the regular romcom stuff. Fortunately, there is reason enough to have hope. This one is written by the writer/director of a movie I loved, A Wednesday. A completely different genre, which makes it even more intriguing.

It doesn't make the fact that Ali Zafar is jarring as an actor any more tolerable though. But, hopefully, Yami Gautam will engage as she did in Vicky Donor. Kirron Kher seems to be doing her usual loud, Punjabi thing. Only this time, she seems to have better lines.

These are then countered by crass jokes in the form of whatever it is Anupam Kher and the grandfather(?) (separately) are up to in the trailer.

With all of the fors and againsts and its average music, Total Siyapaa just might be an average flick that brings in a few laughs, nothing more, nothing less.

Music Reviews:
Bollyspice - "2.5/5"
Bollywood Hungama - "2.5/5"
Milliblog - "Ali offering a good demonstration of his multi-facetedness."
Music Aloud - "7/10"

- meeta, a part of the audience

Total Siyapaa reminded me of Hrishikesh Mukherjee films in many ways. A quirkily different situation in a regular family; the story of the film spans a short time - in this case just a day; all infused with humor. Unfortunately, the last bit doesn't work too well for Total Siyapaa. The attempt at humor is pretty mediocre and falls flat almost all along the way.

There are a couple of times that the lines are really funny and will get a huge laugh out of you. But, other than that, all you do is wonder what is happening and why? This could actually be true of any film with quirky characters and situations. The difference though is that in the ones that are well made, you don't wonder, you just let go and enjoy.

Total Siyapaa is something that you just sit through. In the right frame of mind, it won't seem bad enough that you are enduring it. But, it does have immense potential do that to you. The characters just aren't engaging. It then is all left to the situations, the dialogue and the actors.

The situation of an Indian girl, Asha (Yami Gautam) bringing home a Pakistani boy, Aman (Ali Zafar) had lots of potential to go either way. To either be out-of-the-world hilarious or to go all jingoistic on you. Fortunately and/or unfortunately it doesn't do either. And as most middle grounds are, it becomes boring.

Other than Anupam Kher who is hilarious in his short appearance, the other supporting cast more-or-less overacts. Yami Gautam doesn't have too much to do and Ali Zafar hams as usual. For some reason, I always find Ali Zafar's dubbing off, it comes out way too loud and seems affected.

As with most films that seem funny in the trailers, Total Siyapaa exhausts all its funny lines in its two-minute trailer. As we expected and yet, sad.

- meeta, a part of the audience

30 reviewers(?) - 1 yays 4 so-so 25 nays

Warning: clicking on "full review" will take you to an external website that could contain spoilers.

Thumbs up, by Subhash K. Jha, NDTV : ...Total Siyapaa is total madness. An audacious comedy that dares to poke fun at a border issue, the film is stylised and is attentively staged.... full review

So-So, by Smita Vyas Kumar, Desi Martini : ...The movie is funny in parts which is less than what a true blue comedy should aspire for. Kirron Kher is worth watching. ... full review

So-So, by aneela zeb babar, Desi Martini : ...Buy the DVD. Palat Meri Jaan indeed. But from lining up for the tickets.... full review

So-So, by Martin D'Souza, : ...TOTAL SIYAPAA is different, and palatable!... full review

So-So, by Madhureeta Mukherjee, Times of India : ...Like a cold, cloudy morning in London, this one leaves you with more gloom than glee. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Bobby Sing, Bobby Talks : ...In all TOTAL SIYAPAA is a big letdown, particularly when it is coming from Neeraj Pandey and I was really surprised that its entire screenplay was not re-written but just adapted as it is from its Spanish original without putting in any serious thought, resulting in such a mediocre product... full review

Thumbs down, by Aashi Gahlot, Bolly Spice : ...Total Siyapaa does not work as emotional intelligence seems completely missing from the awkwardly racist threats and jokes.... full review

Thumbs down, by Taran Adarsh, Bollywood Hungama : ...TOTAL SIYAPAA appeals in bits and spurts. You expect a laugh-riot, but what comes across on screen is half-baked. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Namrata Thakker, Bollywood Life : ...Ali Zafar as the hapless Pakistani boyfriend is tolerable. Though his act was impressive in Tere Bin Laden and Mere Brother Ki Dulhan, this time the singer-actor’s comic timing does not hit the bullseye. Yami Gautam is not even tolerable.... full review

Thumbs down, Daily Bhaskar : ...Ali Zafar and Yami Gautam’s acting is neither impressive nor bad.... full review

Thumbs down, Deccan Chronicle : ...Total Siyappa' has been getting a thumbs down from moviegoers with many complaining of a weak plot.... full review

Thumbs down, by Mohit Patil, Desi Martini : ...Occasionally fun, but uneven and confused. And such poised political commentary is a rarity for Bollywood.... full review

Thumbs down, by SOMESH SINHA, Desi Martini : ...A damp squib which will bore the viewers to death. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Tushar Joshi, DNA : ...A wasted opportunity, Total Siyapaa never goes beyond the ordinary and expected. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Deepanjana Pal, FirstPost : ...Part of the problem with Total Siyapaa is that Neeraj Pandey's adaptation is singularly dull, but also, Pandey and the filmmakers are desperate to play it safe Read more at: full review

Thumbs down, by Sweta Kaushal, Hindustan Times : ...The promos are actually the best thing about Total Siyapaa. You should certainly skip this one... full review

Thumbs down, by Rajeev Masand, IBN Live : ...I'm going with two out of five for Total Siyapaa. Funny, but in a pedestrian sort of way. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Suhani Singh, india today : ...Total Siyappa comes across as a poor attempt to marry the films Guess Who's Coming to Dinner and Meet the Parents.... full review

Thumbs down, by Shubhra Gupta, indian express : ...Poor Anupam Kher, getting to play opposite his real-life wife as reel spouse, comes off so embarrassingly, he should wipe this film off his list: I would, if I were made to wander about London in my long johns in a daze.... full review

Thumbs down, Indicine : ...Due to the clash of 3 films this Friday, Total Siyappa has taken a below average opening, but the film could grow from that because couples are likely to catch this film. Unfortunately, due to its content, it won’t make much of a headway at the box office... full review

Thumbs down, by Mohar Basu, koimoi : ...Total Siyapaa is audaciously maddening. Even the slight magic that the story might have had gets butchered in the screenplay.... full review

Thumbs down, by Shakti Shetty, MiD DAY : ...Despite being a romantic comedy, there's hardly any romance in the film, and there isn't much comedy either. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Joginder Tuteja, Movie Talkies : ...with an international setting not quite impressing much either, one wonders what would Bollywood be offering in weeks to come with some original and some not-so-original ideas all set to be unveiled on screen. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Divya Solgama, MoviezADDA : ...Well expecting a dum in this boring and bland film is the biggest joke connected to this film. A good concept by Neeraj Pandey gets super wasted with overdose of hamming actors and unwanted scenes making this Indo-Pak love story seem like a product of international boredom.... full review

Thumbs down, Mumbai Mirror : ...Even the technical departments seem to have given up Asha (hope), because London's dark streets resemble the backlanes of Ahmedabad. Rare exterior shots are grainy and underlit, and the opening aerial shots of the city are 'handicam' on the scale of 0 to digital. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Mansha Rastogi, Now : ...Total Siyappa is a lesson in knowing that merely seeking inspiration from international films isn't enough one still has to work on the script to make it palatable. A complete waste of a good plot. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Sukanya Verma., Rediff : ...Establishing characters in stories, coursing through a span of few hours or a day, is not possible without sharp, insightful writing. And Total faux pas does not deliver any... full review

Thumbs down, by Sonia Chopra, Sify Movies : ...Usually the Indo-Pak issue is dealt with seriousness and jingoistic patriotism in our films. Here, it’s refreshing that the issue has been attempted from a romantic and humorous angle. One wishes the film was as fun, as the concept. Now, that would be something. ... full review

Thumbs down, by Janhavi Samant, Star Blockbuster : ...It takes a really special kind of film to make Anupam Kher look ham. Total Siyappa is that film. Easily avoidable. - See more at: full review

Thumbs down, by SUDHISH KAMATH, The Hindu : ...A faithful remake that offers a few laughs and little else ... full review

60 tweeters(?) - 13 yays 3 so-so 44 nays

thebhokalibong: Total Siyapaa is hilarious hahaha! @AnupamPkher Sir is fantastic! :D

sneha_t1: Total siyapa is a nice movie sometimes the place can make a movie good for u #loveforlondon #london #moviereview @AliZafarsays

Sbaig767: Just now watched Total Siyapaa it was a very comedy and nice movie i like it!!!

sardary20: Best movie total siyapaa

sameer_kamra: Movie review : total siyapa Good movie...really funny....good acting...great writting...

sabawaqar4: Just watched total siyapa ....good one

prianca1012: Ali ! Trust me, Total Siyapaa was really good. Everyone laughed ! What else do we want? You were just perfect! @AliZafarsays

pankajontweet: Total siyapa one time watch full of masti enjoyed...

nichelifestyle: Total Siyapa= Total fun!!!

MehndirattaV: Total Siyapa <3 ;)

devangoza87: Total Siyapaa - Nice Indo-pak love story with full of comedy. Ali with best comedy and yami the beautiful :-);-)

ayeshaw: Bhai wah! I loved the movie! Itne arsay baud itna hassi hoon. Total Siyapaa hogaya yeh tow @alizafarsays

AwaisAkramChema: Watched Ali zafar's movie Total Siyapa at Sozo World around girl's :p....Movie was good Ammar Hussain

zchiragh: Total Siyapa; 4.5/10

tikkview: Total Siyapaa Our rating: 2.5/5.0 Really Disappinting Read detailed...

Mirza_Fawad: Just Watched Total Siyapaa :P Qasm se Totally Siyapaa hay yeh Film :O Rating 6/10 :( :( :( — at Cine Star...

TVMoviesIN: Movie review: Total Siyapaa is a total waste of time: The storyline gets a little too stretched and the jokes ...

tanqeed: Sanket’s Review: Total Siyapaa is a Headache #TotalSiyapaa

TaniaGoklany: Just watched Total Siyapaa. The movie lives upto its name. It's an assault to the brain, and insult to intelligence. Definite miss!

SmartKiller2425: Total Siyapaa is total mind ka siyapaa. Don't waste money. Sasti tareen film.

saniyamalik: Total drag has to be more apt as a title for total siyapaa

RashiChandra: Total Siyapa movie verdict: Don't watch. Even if you don't have anything to watch. Or just watch the first half.

RamjiPoddar: Warning Plz 'Dont Watch ' TOTAL SiyaPAa =D :P — feeling irritated

rajdandy143: Just watched Total Siyapaa! Thus I conclude say to tweeples that this movie Is Total TimeWaste! I was fan of Neeraj Pandey but #unexpected

powertechnique: Total Siyapaa is such an awesome movie Except for the : Bad story Bad Acting Bad Direction

patwaripratik: Total Siyapaa is a Total Chutiyapa ! #TrueStory

ParthSangoi: "@yashshah1994: Total Siyapaa has to be the most boring movie I have ever seen!!!#PATHETICFILM"...hehehe lol!!

nimishdubey: Total Siyapaa is proof - if any were needed indeed -that even a good cast cannot rescue a film from a mediocre script. Flat and predictable.

nikhillohar: Total Siyapaa — feeling angry

nihar123: Total Siyapaa! Poor poor movie. What a waste.

neyha007: #TotalSiyapaa is a Total Siyapaa... The only thing missing was the script..... Oops...

naveenmurali: Total Siyapa - Wish I had known what siyapa meant. Probably then I would have avoided the movie. Loose storyline. Tragedy of errors.

mykthecoolest: Total siyapa full chutiyapa #bollywood #boxoffice #totalsiyapa

MsSonikaSingh: Movie Review: Total Siyapaa is a total mess

MathuresPaul: Total siyapaa, total fly-in-the soup flick.

KlooklReview: Total Siyapaa movie review: Not funny, not romantic, not worth a watch -

jun6lee: Total Siyapaa - likeable main star-cast, but otherwise utter non-sense, made tolerable by it's short duration, bit still needed cuts 1/5 #fb

Jeff_Malik14: "@iFaridoon What was Neeraj Pthinking while writing Total Siyapaa after two gems as a director...Also,did E Nivas really direct Shool?

jannatkhan_: Whaattt were the makers of total siyapa even thinking. #ouch #dafuq #shit

JaiserAbbas: “’Total Siyapaa’ Review Roundup: Avoid it!”

j2381983: Total Siyapaa should be called as total chutiyapaa

isha0708arora: 'Total Siyapaa' was literally a 'SiYaPaA'.....!!!! Gave me a headache...

harneev: Total siyapa .... Not that good though (@ Orbit Multiplex)

gauravvasdev1: Total Siyapaa is not worth your money and time. You can make a Indo-Pak comedy without direct jokes on Pakistan.

GaurangAf7: Total siyapaa was just total #chutiyapa !! Utter bullshit is da word !! Am sorry @LiveForTheBass for forcing you to come along ! Haha

FlippedGarfield: Total Siyapaa happened. What a let down.

fenilpandya: Till now I though that "siyapaa" in the movie total siyapaa was used in place of "chutiyapa" to make it not sound vulgar . Lol

fayazshaikh: total siyapaa. Boring.

dhunji: The makers of Total Siyapaa must be laughing at people who go to see the film.*We titled the film Total Siyapaa and yet they went to see it*

denley86: Watched Total Siyapaa only for @AliZafarsays! Agreed, the film was boring but just loved the leads and of course Kirron Kher.

DeeKayBoss: Just saw Total Siyapa was really a crap but @YamiGautam_YG cute yo

Casual_stranger: just watched Total siyapaa waste ov tYm *_*

BwoodUncensored: Total Siyapa is another Disaster of 2014...

BeingBihari: Gulaab Gang - 3 Star Queen -- 4 Star Total Siyapaa -- 1.5 Star

baccha_jilepi: Total Siyapaa is a really crap movie!

Anusha__k: Total siyapaa was such a stupid movie omg

AneeshChandoke: Ali Zafar is such an underrated actor. Why he is doing average movies goes over my head.Total Siyapaa is avg just coz of him otherwise poor.

alizaidi2002: Ali Zafar's London, Paris, New York was ok.. Chashme Baddoor, I stopped the film within 15 minutes. and Total Siyapaa I walked out of.

aey: Total Siyapaa is total mind ka siyapaa. Don't waste money. Sasti tareen film.

adiratan: What was Neeraj Pandey thinking while making Total Siyapa? It is a disaster. Not what you expect from a person like him after 2 good movies.

No readers have rated this movie yet.

This page has additional observations, other than the ones noted in the main review.

Parental Guidance:

  • Violence: None.
  • Language: Clean
  • Nudity & Sexual content: None
  • Concept: An Indian girl brings home a Pakistani boy she wants to marry. But, that's not the real chaos.

Detailed Ratings (out of 5):

Lead Actors:
Character Artists:
Music Director:

Total Siyapaa - Cast, crew, links

Official Sites:
Background Score:
Music Director:
Costume Designer:
Running time:
110 minutes

Comments (2)

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3 ways aren't "many ways" in case of Mr. Mukherjee's films.

@moviebhakt oh dear, it is a manner of speaking. The overall story reminded me time and again of Hrishikesh Mukherjee films. Doesn't mean I didn't laugh at myself for coming up with that analogy, but it is what it is. :D

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