Review - Kambakkht Ishq: generates hatred for films

wogma rating: Switch channels if it's on cable (?)
quick review:

The story got left behind, far behind. What story, you may ask? And a good question it would be. I can't find a single nice thing to say about a film. Not a line, not one joke. What can you do when the maker's aim is to make an awful film? It runs literally dead slow and has not as much as an iota to savor.

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Wogma Review

An auspicious red and golden cloth flies across the bright blue Los Angeles sky. It is intercut between shots of the source and the destination - Sim's (Kareena Kapoor's) purse on to Viraj's (Akshay Kumar's) face. Creativity of the 50s-90s reproduces itself in Kambakkht Ishq. What were they thinking? Sorry, "thinking" is way too big a word.

Usually, even if it's a bad film, I end up saying, "at least it put some money in the flow, good for the economy." But, I cannot stop hurting at the crores and crores of Rupees drowning from the drain to the core of the earth. What is it that prompted the supposed top-of-the-line stars of the country to entertain this no-line (ouch...just can't make myself call it a plot) and expect the film-starved country to be entertained?

Unless the definition of entertainment has changed to - slo-mo entries, cake fight at a wedding, slap-a-thing-slap-it-again, leching, disgusting innuendos, and so on and so forth. The loud-louder-loudest, loud-louder-loudest contest between Akshay Kumar, Kareena Kapoor, Aftab Shivdasani, Amrita Arora, Jaaved Jaffrey, Kirron Kher and basically the entire cast is insufferable. Kirron Kher and Jaaved Jaffrey should now retire from this genre. For that matter Akshay and Kareena will do themselves AND US good too by not allowing such projects to find its way on the screen. Kareena looks good but she almost always does. So, what's the value-addition made by this particular set of makers?

Having the stalwarts of Hindi films cameo for your film is passé. Hollywood is the new trend. So, we have what looks like stock-footage of Bruce Willis to Angelina Jolie attending a "Stuntman's award ceremony". Then we have Denise Richards, Sylvester Stallone and Brandon do small gigs. And just in case you miss them, or don't recognize them, their name is repeated at every appearance. So, much for creative dialogue. The creativity actually lie in giving credits - Pooja Batra was credited for "acquiring foreign stars". Wonder who "acquired the Bollywood ones"?

The lines were bad, the jokes were lousy and needless to say predictable. The overall film cannot be called obvious because before you say the word "film" you know how it's going to end. Little did I know that the "establishing characters" bit was going to go on for the next 2.5 hours! I was wondering if the constant comments between Akshay and Kareena about each other's IQ was actually a hint at the audience who was still watching the film after the first 10 minutes.

More often than not, movies of this scale have good songs and choreography with an aesthetic sense. Not here. Music is typical Anu Malik stuff. The lyrics although are a bit more interesting than usual.

I don't remember ever having remembered my mom so often while watching a film. The brain went into a rhythmic pattern of internally yelling "MUMMMMY!!!" every couple minutes. The monsoon has set in guys. Go watch the leaves caress each other in the cool air. Certainly beats the awkward Akshay-Kareena lip-locks lip-pecks.

- meeta, a part of the audience

Parental Guidance:

  • Violence: Tons of stunts
  • Language: A few sex-related jokes.
  • Nudity & Sexual content: The complete theme of the movie revolves around having sex.

Detailed Ratings (out of 5):

  • Direction: 0.0
  • Story: 0.0
  • Lead Actors: 0.0
  • Character Artists: 0.0
  • Dialogues: 0.0
  • Screenplay: 0.0
  • Music Director: 0.5
  • Lyrics: 1.5

Kambakkht Ishq - Trailer

Comments (8)

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Punsons:

It is totally bakwaas movie.. totally wastage of money..

meetu:

@TimELiebe whatever works! Only hope you get to see the better films too. :D

meetu:

you HAVE to watch Sholay and Chupke Chupke from 1975. They are my all time favorites. The Sholay DVD i own has very good subtitles too!

meetu:

@TimELiebe Jaya Bachchan was also seen in Kabhie Khushi Kabhie Ghum, but she's no where close to the charming girl she's been in the movies from the 70s. You should catch the two Bachchan's in Abhimaan (1971 i think)

Sholay - well, there have been a couple of people who saw Sholay for this first time recently, and they weren't impressed. Maybe it doesn't appeal to EVERYONE and at ALL TIMES. But for me it is a timeless masterpiece

TimELiebe:

Meetu - answering you two years later! ;)

Yes, we did and we have -along with some even worse ones. :)

meetu:

@TimELiebe which worse ones?

TimELiebe:

Because of some glitch in your MySQL database, I'm guessing, my original comments keep vanishing but your responses don't, @Meetu.

Did I ever answer this? If not, here's a partial list of far worse movies than Kambakkht Ishq:

God Tussi Great Ho
Vivah
Toh Baat Pakki
We Are Family
Dum Maro Dum
Mehbooba
Dil Bole Hadippa

meetu:

@TimELiebe So sorry, no idea what's going on. Will try to fix it.

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