Calendar Girls - Review

wogma rating: Watch if you have nothing better to do (?)
quick review:

Starts off and continues with awful dubbing, follows up with mostly awful acting, fills up with reinforcing stereotypes and finishes up with predictable story-telling.

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Wogma Review

Madhur Bhandarkar must assume your eyes are shut tight for him to call his own films “eye-openers” or he is blind to things that must be going on in the industry to give us such a superficial view. Certainly things far worse must happen in the glam-world than his movies about it say. Having taken this into account, I watch his films as stories rather than revealing account of anything. But Calendar Girls doesn't have that either.

It follows the lives of five girls who have supposedly made it big in the industry because they have posed in a leading calendar. In this age of digital calendars, I don't even know what that means and why that is important. Anyway, moving on, these girls expectedly struggle, make it, break, evolve or give up. Though, there are five directions these lives take, only one of them is half-interesting.

The good bit is that there is not too much drama around the story-telling. Everything is presented in a matter-of-fact tone and just that – a story of a model. But, unfortunately, the characters, their arcs, the lines, the way they say the lines are lacking too.

It is, in fact, amusing the number of times twitter trend is mentioned, making the writers sound like they have discovered a new bird called twitter. And just in case you miss it, they explain what it is all about, which ends up exposing how underexposed the writers are themselves. Like that one person we all know in our lives, who shows off their wealth by mentioning their trip to Mauritius “in passing”.

As smirk-worthy as that is, it is infuriating that the writers must believe they are making a film about women and how empowered they can be. Even if said in jest, “I make women-oriented films because male stars are less professional than women stars” is demeaning to women at so many levels. You give them the benefit of doubt. They must have meant it as a self-deprecating joke; but hey what is self-deprecating about making women-oriented films? They must have meant it as women are more professional; but hey is the comparison necessary and does that mean you'd rather make male-oriented films. Try as I might, there is no good way of making this sound good or even acceptable.

Then the writers run out of occasions to mention twitter and selfie, and go back to tropes like celebrity being paid to attend a funeral. Sure, it is an amusing facet of that world and the associated farce makes you roll your eyes too. But, Mr. Bhandarkar, you didn't think we have forgotten the last time where we saw this, did you?

It doesn't help that hardly any of the actresses can act. Ruhi Singh has a very distracting accent. Her dialogue delivery is actually like that of kids in school dramas. While Kyra Dutt and Akanksha Puri show glimpses of expressions, Avni Modi and Satarupa Pyne are what Madhur Bhandarkar's cameo says about a leading actress – single expression. However, who are we fooling by judging these ladies for their performances, right? They are clearly not here for any of that non-sense.

I must say though, I am a little surprised that the sleaze wasn't as bad as I had expected and it was refreshing to see a Bhandarkar film without a stereotypical, gay fashion designer. Yet, it is always a mark against a film when you start talking about the things the film could've done wrong, but didn't.

- meeta, a part of the audience

Parental Guidance:

  • Violence: None
  • Language: A few abusive words mimed while they are over-recorded with a lesser abusive word.
  • Nudity & Sexual content: Lots of nudity, a few makeout scenes. One character is an high-end escort girl and there are others who of course take up her service.
  • Concept: Follows the lives of 5 women who are calendar girls under the premise of showing the big bad world they live in.
  • General Look and Feel: Nothing extraordinary

Detailed Ratings (out of 5):

  • Direction: 0.5
  • Story: 1
  • Lead Actors: 1.5
  • Character Artists: 0.5
  • Dialogues: 0.5
  • Screenplay: 0.5
  • Music Director: 0.5
  • Lyrics: 0.5

Calendar Girls - Movie Details

Calendar Girls - Trailer

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Comments (7)

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Indian Short Movies:

This may be a good movie as Madhur Bhandarkar usually picks one topic and do good research before making it. Will watch.

Fan:

@Meetu: stop self-inflicting yourself by forcing to see (almost) every film that hits the screen. It is quite alrigt if you decide to skip some absolute rubbish film - I think that the vast majority of wogma visitors are mature enough to understand why you don't go to every film. I know your standard line of defence: however bad or boring the work is at the office, one needs to go to the office :-) True, but in your case you have that rare choice of saying today I am not going to the office.

meetu:

Thanks for the support @Fan. In my defence, I did skip Kis Kisko Pyaar Karoon, didn't I? Though I must say, I did check for shows and would've seen it if it were convenient. :P

Anup:

Despite of any interesting performance other then Kyra i find the movie better then HEROIN which was totally boring and although this was not much of interesting but also not boring to me.. Thanks to skipping all melodrama and Rona Dhona and the short length of the movie..
It was just flat.. Neither going upward nor downward..

Fan:

@Meetu: yeah I noticed that you did skip the Kapil Sharma magnum opus.

I assumed that in your eyes it is so bad that it is not even worth the self-infliction like Hero, Katti Batti or Calendar Girls. Or knowing your views on Grand Masti type films, I thought that you bracketed Kis Kis Ko Pyaar Karu in the same category (which might not be incorrect)

TimELiebe:

What @Fan said, @Meetu - Why on Earth would you inflict this movie on your poor abused eyeballs?

I'm getting a distinct whiff of "daring" "adult" movies from the 1960s, when I was a kid - which are horribly dated now....

meeta:

@Fan I did try. :D

@TimELiebe a creature of habit, over-sincere? Who knows what? But here we are.

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