I hate sinking feelings. And I hate them even more when they have come after a happy spell. Exactly what I hate LUV stories did to me. The only difference is that it was the reason for the happy spell too which had an untimely death. If you haven't gotten it yet, this one is your regular love story, despite all the dressing up.

The cute quips and the charming one-liners make you smile all through the first half, save maybe the first 5-10 minutes when the lead pair's voiceover is reading you their story. You actually start caressing the hope that the film might actually be 'different'. Only the wishful thought is muscled to pulp in ultra s…l…o…w motion as the second hour begins.

The silver lining is that the film doesn't entirely lose its sense of humor even when the going gets bad. Post-interval too, the everyday humor stays and that's truly a relief from the ping-pong ball treatment accorded to the audience.

Also fortunately, Imran Khan and the music/lyrics/picturisation of the songs keeps you entertained through the trauma. Imran has certainly added well to his range of expressions. Only he has too perfect a face to be a chocolate hero and thus a non-believer in love doesn't quite suit him or rather he failed to get that across. Sonam Kapoor is plain, stiff, flat and I'd like to say expressionless but I can't because of the one expression she maintains.

I'd have loved to brand all love stories as hateful, but we've seen some decent ones. And I'm not talking about the traditional MPKs, QSQTs, and DDLJs. The urban takes on the subject - Love Aaj Kal, Wake Up Sid, Luck By Chance, Bachna Ae Haseeno, Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na - have not been bad. But remaking all of them and a few more in one film and that too under the guise of a spoof, doesn't really make it a new story. Note that 2 out of the 5 mentioned are from the LOVE GURUS Yash Raj Films and Dharma Productions and 2 others are spoofs.

Statistics, oh well. I can churn out many such numbers to no avail. A good film is one which doesn't rid me of my happy feeling or at the very least wins the make-audience-happy vs. screw-audiences-gray-cells battle. Let's just say the wait for a good film has become just about bearable thanks to I Hate LUV storys. I hope this is the lull before the Hindi filmmakers will hit us with a huge storm. Waiting. . .